An Open Letter to Whom I Once Admired

"To my fans and friends: I'm finally being honest with myself. I love you all."

    If you've spent anytime on the internet in the last week, you've probably seen that sentence once or twice. It was the beginning of what some think is a huge breakthrough for Christian culture, and others think is another step deeper into a mucky rut. To a girl who looked up to the writer of those words and his band for years in a crucial time of her life, it was nothing short of a time-stopper.

Anyone who grew up in a conservative Christian home knows the core fundamental beliefs of the evangelical church almost as well as they know their own name. In 3rd grade they could probably name every commandment (in order), quote all of Psalm 23 without skipping a beat, tell you exactly what you would need to do to be saved, and answer any question you might have about creation or Noah's ark. If they were one of the more advanced kids, they could probably explain the whole 'death of the firstborn' plague and passover, and why men have one less rib than women. These kids, at some point in their upbringing, were also taught the truth about the confusing topic of why 'some men love men and women love women'. Maybe these kids grew up to disagree at some point, maybe they stuck to what they've always known, or maybe they are still questioning how to feel about it all. I'm one of those kids who stuck to it.

Everyday Sunday was one of the very first bands in the Christian music scene that I discovered. If you know me at all, you know that Christian music plays a part in 95% of my day-to-day life, career, and future plans; it seems to be the clock that keeps my heart ticking. I listened to them almost religiously, would binge-watch videos of them on YouTube, and even talked to them on the phone one time (and definitely hopped around my living room, excitedly squealing afterwards). I was a fan, a supporter, and, of course, a young admirer. Why wouldn't an elementary-middle school girl look up to a band of guys that sing about, talk about, and live for Jesus and make it look super cool and "in"?

Within a decently small amount of time, the band parted ways for unknown reasons. The lead vocalist and his brother continued it for a season, and then that ended. The lead vocalist started another band that I still haven't heard to this day, and also planned an Everyday Sunday tour, but then that never happened. Everything was ending quickly without explanation and soon enough all I saw were status updates, tweets, and Instagram photos from the Everyday Sunday crew. With Christian music constantly growing and expanding, I was left thinking that things just weren't happening for the band anymore, so they decided to called it quits. But in reality, a whole different world was taking shape.

Trey Pearson.
The voice behind the music. The most familiar face. One of my past role models. The one who pridefully unveiled his 'real' identity to the world.
You are deeply, passionately, unconditionally, madly loved by the same God you sang about years ago and still claim as yours today. He has gifted you and made plans for you that exceed your comprehension and wildest dreams. But from a girl that will always admire you in some way deep down for being a positive voice in her youth and being apart of the strong force of music in her life, my heart is aching. Not for the band, not for me, but for you. For your family. For our world. For those who will see Christians falsely due to your statements. We both know the truth, we both know what He said. That hasn't changed. But He doesn't hate you the way that you were always taught He does. He loves you so fiercely that He doesn't want you to stay where you are, He wants you to be the best version of you that you can be. The one He created you to be. And I pray that you become that version of you.

We might disagree on a lot of things at this point, but I love you and pray for you with everything in me. I pray for your wife, your kids, and the people you're impacting by making such a loud statement. I pray that God touches your heart and you follow where He leads you, even if that means taking a few steps back and feeling the weight of regret. I believe with every ounce of my being that this isn't who He created you to be, but I know you have that person somewhere deep inside of you, beyond the deceptive false identity you've been fed.

From the girl who has admired you since the beginning, and still believes in God's unfailing plan beyond this uproar and false you...

You are more.